How to use a vibrator
Read about the author Samantha Evans
Many vibrators come with instruction manuals to tell you how it works but few actually show you what to do with one.
This might seem self explanatory but if you have never used a vibrator before, you may not know what to do.
This guide offers you advice about how to enjoy your vibrator to its full extent and discover the intense sexual pleasure you can get from using a vibrator.
1. Get to know your vibrator
Take your vibrator out of the packaging. Wash it carefully with warm water and soap or use a toy cleaner, prior to use, ensuring you do not get water into the battery case or charging mechanism if it isn’t waterproof.
If it does come with an instruction manual or leaflet, read it before you start pressing buttons.
If it needs to be charged before use, plug in the charger. Many rechargeable vibrators use a charger similar to a mobile phone charger. Charge it for the recommended time to ensure it is fully charged before use.
If it requires batteries, find out what type it takes. Some sex toy companies provide free batteries with their products. Often, when a vibrator doesn’t work, it is because the batteries have been inserted incorrectly so try switching them around. Some products have a small paper disc inside the battery compartment on top of the batteries which should be removed before use.
This may seem like common sense but many people think their product doesn’t work when they have actually put the batteries in incorrectly or have not removed the paper disc.
Check the vibrator for any sharp edges or seams. Ensure that it is fully intact and all wires are covered and secure in the battery or charging case. Contact the supplier if you are unsure about your product before using it as many will not refund or exchange a product if it has been used, unless it is faulty.
Have a play with the buttons, finding out what speeds it has and pulse/vibration modes. Work out if it has independent motors which work separately as seen in some rabbit vibrators, where the body of the vibrator works independently from the ears.
Familiarising yourself with the control mechanisms will mean you can enjoy uninterrupted sex play and not have to fiddle with the controls at that crucial moment!
2. Experiment on your own
It is a good idea to experiment with your vibrator before using it with a partner. Getting to know your vibrator will make you feel less self conscious in front of your partner. Once you have familiarised yourself with your vibrator, you can show them what feels good and how to use the vibrator on you.
Make time for yourself in private, lock the door, if you can, and turn on some music if you have flatmates, children, thin walls or elderly relatives wandering about the house. Many vibrators are quite quiet but if you are concerned about being heard, cover the vibrator with a duvet or pillow. However, it will probably be you making all the noise and not your vibrator!
3. Use a mirror
This may seem strange but using a mirror to see what you are doing can be a great turn on as well as informative. Keep the lights on so you can see specific places on your body that respond to stimulation. This will enable you to tell your partner where to touch you to ensure they hit the right spot.
If you are visually impaired, having a heightened sense of touch enables you to find out how your body responds to your vibrator and what you like.
4. Play with your vibrator all over your body
Play with your vibrator on other parts of your body such as your neck, nipples, insides of thighs rather than jumping into clitoral or vaginal massage, to feel the power of the vibrations.
Some vibrators double up as body massagers too, such as the Doxy and Rocks-Off Purple Heart offer powerful vibrations, ideal for easing aching muscles as well as stimulating your clitoris and vagina.
Enjoy massaging your body all over, noticing how your vibrator feels in your hand. If you have limited mobility or manual dexterity, experiment with supporting your vibrator on a pillow or cushion or held between your knees.
Some vibrators such as Fun Factory Stronic Real and Fun Factory Bi Stronic Fusion contain magnets which create a thrusting action which can be left in place if your manual dexterity is impaired.
5. Take your time
Start by gently massaging your clitoris with your vibrator on the lowest speed setting to familiarise yourself with the feeling of waves of vibrations. You may not have experienced such feelings of stimulation before, so take your time to enjoy this sensual touch.
Slowly increase the speed setting to a level that feels pleasurable for you. Keep your vibrator in the same place to allow a build up of sensations as your body responds to this sexual stimulation or slowly move it against your body to enjoy different levels of pleasure.
If the vibrations feel too strong, lower the speed setting, use a gentler touch or try using a towel between you and your vibrator. Some women enjoy lower speed settings and happily achieve powerful orgasms whereby others require stronger stimulation to reach orgasm.
Many women use a vibrator during sexual intercourse to reach orgasm through clitoral stimulation.
6. Play with vibration modes and patterns
Many vibrators don’t just buzz but offer a variety of vibration patterns and modes, combined with different speed settings.
Experiment with the vibration patterns to find one to suit your needs. Some women enjoy full on vibration modes, other prefer intermittent and revving patterns which slowly increase the intensity of the vibration, then decrease it.
This mode may be best suited to someone who orgasms very quickly as it allows them to prolong their sexual excitement and pleasure.
7. Experiment with pressure
Use your vibrator to experiment with different levels of pressure, from feather-like caresses over your clitoris to deep pressure, to find out what turns you on.
8. External pleasure
All vibrators offer external pleasure, but some are designed just for that, such as clitoral vibrators like the Je Joue Mimi Soft Rocks-Off Bamboo and We-Wibe Tango. Even though they are smaller in size, they still contain powerful motors and are ideal for slipping between you and your partner during sexual intercourse.
Many vibrators are shaped to a tapered end, making insertion easy and some have a shaped head, such as OhMiBod Cuddle, ideal for g-spot stimulation but also great for clitoral play too as they cover a larger area, sending out waves of vibrations through your clitoris and vagina.
Massaging your vibrator all over your labia, hood of your clitoris and just inside your vagina will produce a variety of stimulation.
The Satisfyer Pro 2 is not a vibrator but creates gorgeous clitoral stimulation through sound wave technology, gently teasing your clitoris into orgasmic pleasure.
Most vibrators feel even more pleasurable when used with a lubricant. Again, when choosing a sexual lubricant, select one that is skin safe too. Try using an organic product, such as YES organic lubricant or one that does not contain chemicals which may cause an allergic reaction or allergy.
9. Internal pleasure
Vibrators come in all shapes and sizes and finding one to suit your sexual needs is down to your personal preference. Ensure that your vibrator is suitable for internal use. It should feel smooth, have no rough edges and will not absorb bodily fluids. By choosing a skin safe vibrator made from silicone, you can be assured that it will feel velvety smooth against your vagina and clitoris, easy to clean and not cause damage to your vagina.
If you are a vibrator virgin and new to these products, try a slim sex toy such as theRocks-Off Slinky Pinky, Picobong Zizo or OhMiBod Mini Cuddle. These vibrators are all slimmer in size but still have powerful motors.
If you prefer a fuller sensation, try the Fun Factory Big Boss G5, Fun Factory Tiger G-5 or the lovely Rocks Off Rapture and Rocks Off Jira
Gently massage a small amount of lubricant onto your clitoris and around the inside of your vagina as well as onto the shaft of your vibrator.
Once you have aroused yourself through external stimulation, you can slowly insert your vibrator into your vagina. Go at your own pace, slowly pushing the vibrator into your vagina. You may want to do this when it is turned off to get used to the sensation it creates. Play with your vibrator by moving in and out slowly.
Turn on the motor and experiment with the vibration speeds and patterns to find a level that is pleasurable for you. Some women enjoy just leaving their vibrator in place to experience the waves of vibration coursing through their body, others enjoy moving the vibrator in and out, going deeper or stimulating the external part of the vagina.
G-spot vibrators, such as the OMB Cuddle are designed to stimulate the g-spot and are often curved in shape to reach that ever elusive area.
The Stronic range by Fun Factory offer a thrusting motion, similar to that experienced during sexual intercourse.
By playing with your vibrator and applying pressure, you may discover your g-spot and enjoy a deeper orgasm that lasts longer than a clitoral orgasm. It will feel different to a clitoral orgasm and take longer to build. By adjusting the control of your vibrator, you can make these pleasurable sensations last longer to prolong your orgasms.
10. Teach your partner
Now you have become best friends with your vibrator, introduce it into your sex play. Most men are happy to incorporate sex toys into their sex play when they realise that they are not being replaced! Sex toys enhance sexual pleasure and showing your partner how you use your vibrator and what it can do for you both will increase your sexual arousal and excitement. It may even make your sex play more adventurous.
Many men will enjoy having their own sex show by watching you play with your vibrator. Show them how to use it on your body to increase your sexual pleasure by allowing them to take control.
Use your vibrator on their body too, by massaging their nipples, neck, inner thighs, around their testicles and all over the shaft and tip of the penis.
By teaching your partner how to pleasure you with your vibrator and using it during sex play, you will enjoy better sexual stimulation and may experience stronger, more powerful and more frequent orgasms.
There are many sex toys for men such as vibrating cock rings, like Je Joue Mio which can be worn during sexual intercourse to create bigger, harder erections and stimulate the clitoris too.
Sex toys designed for couples’ play, can be worn during sex to pleasure you both such as the Doppio which can be used for solo play, worn during couples sex, and also comes with an optional remote.
11. When penetrative sex isn’t possible
Sexual intercourse doesn’t always mean penetrative sex but any form of sexual pleasure and using a vibrator can offer sexual stimulation.
Sometimes full penetrative sex is not possible, due to illness, disease, disability or medical conditions or simply being single so using a vibrator is ideal to ensure that you still enjoy sexual pleasure together or alone. The Pulse III Duo by Hot Octopuss offers sexual stimulation to both the man and his partner even when he is unable to maintain an erection.
Some medical conditions can cause desensitisation of the genital area and using a vibrator, such as the Doxy can enable a person to feel sexual pleasure even if they have reduced sensation.
Sex toy tips
When buying a vibrator, choose skin safe products to avoid allergic reactions from latex, jelly or rubber products. These materials absorb bacteria and are difficult to clean. Products made from silicone not only feel velvety soft when used but are also easy to clean too.
Always clean your vibrator after use, either with soap and warm water or a cleaning spray.
Store in a clean, dry place, preferably in a bag. Some products come with their own travel bag for storage but any cloth drawstring bag is suitable.
Use a pH balanced sexual lubricant with your vibrator to enhance your sexual pleasure. Always ensure that it is skin safe to avoid irritation or allergic reactions. Do not use silicone lubricants with silicone products as it will degrade the vibrator, damaging the silicone.
If using an anal vibrator, always choose one that is designed for anal penetration. It should be smooth, seamless and have a flared base to prevent full insertion into the anus and use an anal lubricant such as YES BUT
Do not use your vibrator for both vaginal and anal use as you can transfer bacteria from your anus to your vaginal area.
Remove the batteries each time you use it to avoid it being left on at a low speed and the batteries draining of power. Like all battery operated appliances, if left for extended periods with the batteries intact, they can corrode and leak into the battery case, destroying the product.
Many rechargeable vibrators can be locked to prevent them buzzing away quietly if left on by mistake and to avoid embarrassment when travelling through airports.
Hopefully this guide will help you to get the best possible use from your vibrator and deliver many hours of intensely, satisfying sexual play and excitement. Have fun!