A New Year’s Resolution I Can Keep


Hello 2014! So I made my resolutions, Diary: do you want to hear them? I’m going to cut back on the wine and the chocolate and I’m going to do more exercise.

Christmas was great: I ate lots, drank lots and had a merry old time but now I need to get back to what passes as normality in the Divine household. Every year it’s the same. The Christmas of 2012 saw my parents buying me a bike so 2013 started with grit and determination and chafed thighs. The bike has stood neglected in the garage since early March. It turned out to not be my thing.

2012 was the year I went to Zumba… once. Dear Lord, all that shaking and jumping and shimmying, my boobs nearly flew off! No, Zumba was definitely not for me. Neither was jogging, aquarobics or a gym membership. Every single one of my hair-brained exercise-related New Year’s resolutions ends up going tits up (literally in the case of Zumba!) within a matter of weeks.

2014 is the year of doing something that I enjoy that expends energy and helps to tone up my muscles. I thought about doing more housework, but that really isn’t something I enjoy. Apparently most things I DO enjoy can’t be classed as exercise. Whipping cream by hand is hard work, but it’s negated when you then eat the end product. Sewing involves lots of hand movements but apparently they’re not classed as strenuous. Yes, me and Mr Divine had a long and involved conversation about it.

In the end we worked out there was one activity I really enjoyed that’s also actually exercise. Sex. Luckily enough my husband really enjoys it too, so my New Year’s resolution counts for him as well. We’ve agreed to get steamy once a week at least. It’s not the easiest resolution ever to keep: don’t get me wrong, I love sex with Mr Divine but we don’t always get the time we’d like together so we’ve had to get inventive.

The quickie is a god-send. We’re becoming experts in fitting in a little adult fun time in small windows of opportunity. We had a quickie in the shower one Saturday morning, both kids sound asleep, the water masking our noises. Then there’s those occasions when the kids have both left for school on time and he’s got ten minutes before he has to leave.

The other Sunday afternoon we got a whole hour to ourselves as my son left the house just a while before his sister was due back. We had a really good work out then, really got puffed out. I felt it in the back of my thighs for days afterwards. But you know what they say, no pain no gain and all that malarkey.

This is the longest I’ve ever managed to keep a New Year’s resolution and long may it continue! I think I’ll suggest we do the same one next year as well!